(Image found in Google search)
This is not my typical post, though it is quite possible that more is to come. The phrase, “Not my intent“, baffles me. It seems to me, that phrase is desired to be a sincere apology. It seems that the user of this phrase would like things to be just the same as they were before whatever situation occurred. Keep in mind, I too am guilty of using this phrase.
What I’ve learned through the years is, merely saying, “That wasn’t my intent”, doesn’t remove the damage. That phrase doesn’t wipe away the hurt. This phrase doesn’t act like the memory eraser from The Men In Black. No, there consequences that we face from our words and actions. Allowing people to feel and work through their pain is one of them.
It is unfair to expect one to instantly move on because it wasn’t your intent. We’ve all dealt with hurt. We’ve all heard of another’s intent. We’ve all stated, “Though that wasn’t your intent, the reality is…”.
The truth of the matter is, words hurt. The truth of the matter is, actions hurt. The truth of the matter is, recovery time will be needed. The truth of the matter is, you may or may not be forgiven. The truth of the matter is, the relationship may never be the same. The truth of the matter is, you have no say in how and or how long someone deals with your inflicted pain.
We must be mindful of the words we speak. We have to be mindful of the actions we take. There is a cost for everything. Can you afford it?
Love you, be blessed! – AWS 11.15.16